In paths they do not know I will guide them.
I will make darkness into light before them
And rugged places into plains.
These are the things I will do,
And I will not leave them undone.”
Isaiah 42:16
Some decades ago, I quoted the first sentence or two of this verse publicly as a way of announcing that I had made an important life decision. I believed I was being led of the Lord, even though I didn't fully understand what I took to be His reasoning. I was so sure it was His choice for me, I walked blind onto a path that would end up virtually destroying my life. I didn't understand until much later that it was I who had led myself to this path, essentially guessing God's will based on a series of circumstances, rather than seeking His intimate counsel through prayer. Of course, He is not to blame for this. I've realized in the meantime that He gave me warning signs.
I suppose my heart was in the right place -- I truly wanted to know His will, but didn't know how to find it. I have no idea whether God ever honors foolish blind leaps as sincere commitments to Him. He reads the heart, sure. But I'll have to leave it to Him to decide whether good intentions count for anything, spiritually.
This lead-up is simply to say that I tried to avoid the above verse for many years, because all that came to mind when I read it was me, making a fool of myself.
Today I read something new in it: voluntary "blindness." Yes, often God speaks of His people as blind, and it is not a compliment. It probably isn't here either, but there is also a positive principle at work. God can't lead someone whose vision is competing with His; He can't lead someone who brings his or her own flashlight to see by in the darkness. If He Himself is not our eyes and our light, we will go off course.
A Christian living in step with God is someone who in a sense has become voluntarily blind, surrendering the right to see where the path is leading. And what does He promise to those He guides along His path? He will turn the darkness into light before them; He will be their guide through the unknown; He will make the rugged places smooth.
The light and the smooth plains He speaks of are spiritual -- the path itself may be very dangerous. In fact, if it's His path, it will be dangerous to some extent. We will be taken through enemy territory, because that's where the battles are being waged.
I couldn't have seen these things those many decades ago, because I didn't understand yet what it was to be truly surrendered to Him. Making myself voluntarily blind for His sake was what I thought I was doing, but I had it wrong. This voluntary blindness isn't actually blindness: it's surrendering my eyes for HIS eyes. He can see perfectly. As I yield to Him, letting Him become my only light and my only guide, I will learn to see with His eyes rather than my own.
Did He despair when I got it so wrong back then? Is He embarrassed to think back to that moment, as I have been? I doubt it. It dismayed Him that I didn't understand, but He knew how it would eventually turn out. He knew my mistake would one day lead me back to Him, and to a much deeper understanding and commitment.
“I am the Light of the world," Jesus said (John 8:12). "He who follows Me will not walk in the darkness, but will have the Light of life.”
I wasn't really following Him then, but my heart wanted to. And in the end, He reads the heart. If it is truly His, He leads it home.