David Wilkerson devotional,
September 12, 2012:
"A Contrite Spirit"
This makes me wonder: where does a broken and contrite spirit come from? How do we get it? For some people, something life-threatening has to happen to bring them to this point. For a long time, I no doubt thought my spirit was broken before the Lord, because I'd cried to Him so many times, and because so many things in my life were broken. I see now that this is not the "brokenness" God meant me to learn. It did actually take a life-threatening situation to bring me to a deeper understanding of what God was looking for from me. But God doesn't always place people in life-threatening situations to teach them contrition. Some people are just quietly awakened to the fact that their relationship with Him will never be all that it could be unless they accept life on His terms. As they begin to pray, read His word, and gradually learn to trust Him, their commitment grows deeper, and their hearts grow more yielded to Him.
As David Wilkerson puts it, "God knew that something in Jacob's heart was willing to be changed." That's really all a broken, contrite spirit is. Yes, God reserves the right to show us our need in whatever way He chooses. I believe there will turn out to be concrete reasons for the method God used in my life, which was about as quiet as a nuclear explosion. Yet it's His tapestry, not mine, and He personalizes His lessons to each person. If I'm not learning anything new from Him, it probably means I'm not fully yielded to Him.
God's lessons can be painful; He desires a broken spirit, after all, not a put-together spirit. But He is gentle, and His lessons will always lead us to His heart, which is gentle; and to His way for us, which is vastly higher and more meaningful than what we could have planned for ourselves.