But this winter has been unusual, with almost non-stop extreme cold, and snow that now reaches halfway up the tree trunks. I'm not fond of winter driving. My car also needs a repair and rustproofing, thanks to rusting caused by last year's mild but slushy winter. The repair will be expensive. I was going to get it done last summer, but other repairs ate up the money I had designated for it. So, whenever possible I've been avoiding commuting by car in wintry weather. VIA Rail and I have been getting to know each other a little too well for my pocketbook's comfort.
The cheapest fare is around $20 each way, and it's only available online. When the seats they have at that fare sell out, you pay more. So you have to get very good at anticipating what the weather will be a day or two ahead. One day I had decided to drive, but when I woke up, the weather forecasters were freaking out about accidents and very slippery conditions in the city I was driving to. I very grudgingly bought a last-minute train ticket, significantly more expensive than it would have cost a day or two earlier. I almost cried when I saw that the roads were actually fine. Maybe the weather channel will reimburse me? Ha ha.
Next week is Reading Week (a break from classes) at universities across Ontario. Friday is also Valentine's Day; Monday is Family Day. Consequently, a whole whack of people have booked train tickets for the end of this week. I discovered this about ten days ago, when I happened to notice that tickets for Valentine's Day evening were already selling out. So, last Friday or Saturday I decided I'd better check the status of the fares and availability for Thursday (tomorrow). There were no seats at the cheapest fare for the evening trip. "Flurries" were being forecast for tomorrow, but here in the snow belt we know what that can turn out to mean. True, they really don't know a week beforehand what the precise weather conditions will be.
I was all set to drive. Then fear set in. What if I didn't buy a ticket and it was a snowy mess on Thursday? I might have to pay something like $80 to do the commute, or (considering how quickly Valentine's Day had begun to sell out) maybe there wouldn't even be any tickets for Thursday.
I bought the ticket. The total came to $56.50 for the round trip. Not as expensive as my "weather channel" mistake, but still. I could almost pay my hydro bill with that.
OK, so I have a ticket for Thursday. Fine.
On Sunday, a mess of wet snow fell. And fell. By mid-afternoon, it was still falling. The roads looked like a big brown slushie. I checked Environment Canada, who are usually more accurate, says my cousin the beekeeper (I'm not blaming him for what happened next). Environment Canada predicted light snow until Sunday midnight, then flurries -- or maybe "flurries" -- on Monday morning and afternoon.
I bought a ticket for Monday, too.
On Monday morning, the sun was shining. The roads in town were still messy, but things were improving. I realized that if I'd taken the car, the roads would have been completely fine by the time I'd had to leave.
I got to the train station and checked the arrival status. Two hours late? I waited a while to find out what was going on, then I called and asked for a refund. (They will waive the $18 per ticket service charge, but only if they are at fault.)
I was able to get everything I needed to do finished at home, and left in plenty of time to teach my classes. The roads were great.
Here's the interesting part:
Both times, I acted out of fear. This is sin. And yet...
While I was at the station on Monday, sizing up what to do, I got into conversation with a lady who takes the train once a week to a city about an hour and a half away, to work at a library. We talked about the snow day we and a lot of other people had to take two weeks ago when the train was stuck in London in 12-foot snow drifts and blocked by a freight train. They eventually sent a bus, apparently, but not until early afternoon.
The lady and I had a good chat. She recalled having seen me at the station before, and even remembered a conversation I'd had with someone about a library-related issue. I made sure to get her name before I headed home.
As I was walking home, I started to smile. I said to the Lord, "That's why You let me buy that ticket, isn't it? So she and I would meet."
Tomorrow is now supposed to be mild and sunny. I could have driven and parked for around $20, but I will have to use my $56.50 ticket. Unless the train is really late again. The Lord may provide me this way out again, but I'm not counting on it.
This may seem like a long, random story about train tickets, but really it's a story about our lives.
We mess up. We fail to trust Him. We take things into our own hands. In short, we sin.
Jesus is there for us when we sin. He bore that sin in His own body; He knows it intimately. And because He bore it then, He can do something with it now.
Who knows why He may want me on that train tomorrow? Maybe just to let a lesson about trust to sink in. Or maybe there will turn out to be another reason. On Monday, there was a divine purpose; tomorrow there will be one, too. Whether or not it's obvious to me is irrelevant.
Jesus died and was raised from the dead. This is a fact, but it is also a picture. He creates life out of death, order out of chaos, beauty out of ruin.
Give Him your sin. Give Him your mistakes. Give Him everything, for that matter. His mouth sang life into being. He has a plan.